“Eric’s first friend”. Based from this old parody by T&M, The Friend Store, where Eric literally buys Kenny as a friend. Kenny sure likes tea parties thanks to Karen, he’s just confused because Cartman’s chair is really close to his.
I will never understand fanon characterizations of Kyle that make him shy or submissive or excessively insecure like….the boy is feisty to the point of getting irrational when something makes him angry and the bitch knows he’s a genius